


darling, only you can ease my mind

by Asanamu



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Don't worry its sweet though, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-24
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2020-01-31 08:35:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18587632
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asanamu/pseuds/Asanamu
Summary: Patrick helps David deal with his insecurities.Or, I watched the music video for Ease My Mind by Ben Platt and all I could think about were David and Patrick





	darling, only you can ease my mind

**Author's Note:**

> Just a quick little thing based off of the Ease My Mind music video, but ignoring the sad ending.

David was so focused on stirring his tomato sauce that he jumped when he heard his phone ring, nearly dropping the wooden spoon when he reached to answer it.

“Hey, do you want me to pick up dinner for us at the cafe on my way home? I’m gonna be closing up in like 15.” Usually hearing Patrick’s voice on the other end of the line made David feel warm and happy, but this time it just increased the buzz of nervous anticipation he had been feeling since he woke up on his entire day off.

“No, don’t go to the cafe. Come straight back to your place, okay?”

“Is everything alright there, David? You’re never one to turn down a meal.” David bit his lip, suddenly feeling embarrassed at Patrick’s concern.

“Everything’s fine! We can eat at home.” Sensing Patrick’s confusion, David continued. “I’m doing a nice thing, okay! Just come home when you can. I love you.”

“Look at you David, being a _nice_ person,” David could practically hear Patrick’s smirk. “I’ll be home soon. I love you too.”

David’s stomach flip-flopped at the memory of Patrick’s teasing the day after their first kiss. Logically, he knew that it was a long time ago and Patrick only brought up the whole “nice person” thing to be funny, not because he actually believes it. But the little voice in David’s head couldn’t help but suggest that maybe Patrick secretly wishes that David was less selfish and materialistic. Patrick was probably one of the nicest people in the world, and he deserved a boyfriend who could compete with that.

On one of the many dark nights David spent unable to sleep, staring up at Patrick’s ceiling while his brain churned out new insecurities at a dangerously rapid velocity, he had concocted a plan. On David’s next day off, he would surprise Patrick with a romantic home-cooked dinner ready for him when he got back from the store. It’s a sweet gesture that Patrick would do for David in a heartbeat.

Which is how David found himself compulsively stirring a pot of tomato sauce while he waited for the water to boil.

The intent was to have the meal completely done by the time Patrick got home, but David spent longer than he anticipated setting the table and making sure everything looked perfect. He knew that he wasn’t the best cook, but aesthetics were something David was confident that he could perfect. But now, Patrick would be back from the store any minute and the spaghetti had just started cooking.

Suddenly, David heard the sound of a key turning in the lock. Shit.

 

“David, are you cooking? It smells amazing in here!”

“Do you have to sound so surprised? Yes, I’m cooking. I thought- I don’t know- I wanted to make you a romantic dinner,” David ducked his head, feeling a little sheepish as Patrick came into the kitchen and pressed a kiss on his cheek.

“Can I taste?” Patrick asked, and David held the wooden spoon up to his boyfriend’s mouth and waited in anticipation.

Patrick raised his eyebrows, almost incredulously. “It’s really good, David. How come I didn’t know you could cook?”

“I mean, pasta isn’t too hard. You know, I did live on my own once. Just don’t ask me to make enchiladas.” David shook his head at the memory. “How about you go wash up and I’ll finish cooking? The food should be ready in a few minutes.”

David glanced back at Patrick walking to the bathroom, and then turned his attention back to the tomato sauce. He had to get this right.

_Deep breath._

 

\--------------------------

 

They were finally sat down at the kitchen table, with candles flickering between them and Patrick’s good dishes filled with delicious food, yet David couldn’t quite relax. He twirled his rings and tapped his fingers in an attempt to expel the nervous energy thrumming through him. Doubts swirled around in his mind and just kept getting louder and louder, drowning out Patrick’s voice chatting about a conversation he had had with one of their suppliers. It took David a moment to notice that Patrick had stopped talking and had that loving, concerned look on his face that he got whenever he noticed David’s anxiety.

David dropped his head. He didn’t deserve that look.

When the thoughts became so muddled together that they just turned to ringing in his ears, David took a deep breath to calm himself. And another. And another.

Patrick- wonderful, sweet, _nice_ Patrick- noticed David’s increased unease and reached across the table, placing his hand on top of his boyfriend’s fidgety one. Usually, the gesture had a calming effect, but this time it only caused David to start tapping his thumb faster.

David suddenly became aware that he couldn’t get in as much air with each breath. He tried breathing deeper, suddenly worried about passing out from lack of oxygen or from too much oxygen, or-

Now near hyperventilation, David felt Patrick tighten his grip on his cold and clammy hand, and allowed himself to be led out of his chair and towards Patrick’s bed.

Patrick sat down on the comforter and motioned for David to sit as well, but David started pacing instead. Anxiety buzzed around in him like bees trapped in a jar trying to escape. He shook his arms out, in an attempt to get the bees to stop slamming themselves against the glass, but the feeling only seemed to build up more.

As David paced back and forth, trying to calm himself by alternating between wringing his hands and clasping them behind his neck, Patrick stayed silent. He just sat on the edge of the bed and allowed David a moment to try and regulate his anxiety, knowing that David needed to try and deal with it himself first.

Once the buzzing in his limbs started to subside a bit, David sat down on the bed and placed his hands on his knees, his breathing still shallow and shaky. Patrick rubbed circles on his back, grounding him as the breaths eventually started to come easier and the shaking in his arms lessened.

 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Patrick asked softly, his free hand intertwining with David’s.

“Not really.” David flopped backwards onto the mattress and groaned in frustration, rubbing his hands over his face. “Ugh! I’m sorry I’m such a mess.”

Patrick shook his head. “Can you sit up?”

David nodded weakly and sat up slowly. Patrick quietly guided David off the bed, and they both sat down on the floor against the edge of the bed. Patrick wrapped one arm around the back of David’s neck and used the other to stroke David’s folded upper arms. He knew from past panic attacks that sitting on the floor helped to ground David.

David took a slow, deep breath and opened his mouth like he was going to begin talking. He paused, and Patrick waited. Pushing would just get David to shut down.

“I just- I wanted to do something nice for you because you’re always doing things for me and I don’t want you to think I’m selfish but if I’m doing something nice just so that you don’t think I’m selfish isn’t that selfish anyway and you deserve someone more romantic than me and-”

“David. Breathe,” Patrick interrupted. “How could I think you’re selfish? You spent your whole day off planning a romantic dinner for me, and you cheer me on at baseball games even though you hate it, and you always remember to order in on Tuesdays because I hate meatloaf night at the cafe. There’s a million other things you do for me and I can’t list them all, but I appreciate every single one of them. You’re a lot of things, David Rose, but you are definitely not selfish. Especially not in the bedroom.” Patrick finished with a wink, knowing that David would appreciate an attempt to lighten the mood.

David gave a small chuckle and turned towards Patrick, who kissed him on the cheek and then looked into his eyes with so much love it was nearly overwhelming.

“Is it okay if I get up for a second?” Patrick asked, “I have an idea. I’ll be right back.”

Patrick got up and walked into the kitchen, leaving David to close his eyes and take a moment to collect himself.

He opened his eyes to see Patrick walking back towards the bed with one of the candles from the table and one of the abandoned bowls of spaghetti with two forks. He set the candle carefully down on the floor and offered a fork to David.

David smiled and felt his eyes fill with tears. What did he do to deserve such an amazing boyfriend?

As if he could read David’s mind, Patrick said assuredly,“I don’t want to hear you say that you don’t deserve me, David. Because you do. You deserve everything.”

“Come on. We can’t let this delicious food go to waste,” Patrick added, twirling some spaghetti around his fork and shoving it into his mouth.

They ate the food on the floor and lapsed back into easy conversation, and David couldn’t help but look at Patrick and smile as the constant anxious voices in his mind eased.  


**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic in this fandom, so go easy on me!
> 
> Also I highly recommend listening to Ben Platt’s new album.


End file.
